Winter Blah's

Much to my disappointment, Christmas here in Northeast Ohio was trying its best to be white, but it came a few days early and then a few days late.  I managed to get in one run outside in between the snow storms, but now it seems like the flood gates have been opened - just as the snow from the previous storm starts to melt enough, another storm comes through.  I live in a very small neighborhood of a few cul-de-sac's, so our roads don't get much attention from the road cleaning crews.  And the bike trail I usually run on doesn't get cleaned, salted, or plowed at all.  Without proper trail shoes, I'm forcing myself to stay inside and use the treadmill instead.  I can see it now - my clumsy self, slipping on ice, falling and breaking an arm or cracking my head open on the pavement, with not a soul in sight to come rescue me or help me out.  No thanks.

Meanwhile, as I lament the abundance of snow and consider warmer places to live, I keep on running on that faithful friend, my treadmill.  Thursday was one of those days that I really just didn't want to run.  I was tired, had a headache, was sore from shoveling 10 inches of snow off my driveway the day before, and felt like I was developing some head/sinus congestion.  Blah.  But I'd finally started to get back to my normal eating habits (aka healthy eating :o)) after the holidays, and my body was thankfully feeling more like itself.  I knew a run would make me feel even better - plus I couldn't give up on my Holiday Running Streak so close to the end.  So I got changed into my running clothes and shoes, and stepped onto the treadmill, content with just doing 3 or 4 miles at a nice easy pace, since I didn't feel all that great.  I wasn't going to worry about pace or time - just run for the enjoyment of it and for a nice workout without pushing myself too hard.  I was surprised at how good that truly felt, and as I approached mile 3, I felt fantastic.  My headache had subsided, my nose wasn't feeling very stuffy anymore, and I wasn't as tired as I'd been when I got on the treadmill (my arms and back, however, were still sore as ever from my snow shoveling!).  So I kept going towards mile 4, and my mind couldn't help but wander to greater things.  What if I could keep this nice easy pace up through mile 4 and still feel good?  Should I keep going?  I'd never tried to run more than 4 miles before, but I'd love to see if I could run 5.  My runs earlier this week hadn't been the longest, as I'd tried to squeeze them in among Christmas events and celebrations, so my weekly mileage was already low for already being Thursday.  What the heck, I thought - what did I have to lose?  And so I kept going!  And guess what?  I made it 5 miles!!!!!!!!!  It took me 48:17, but that was okay with me.  It was still under 10 minutes per mile, and further than I'd ever run before.  How exciting!  :o)

So when Friday rolled around, I was feeling about the same as Thursday, except with a bit more sinus congestion, and thought I could feel better again with a run.  It worked yesterday, so it should work again today, right?  Wrong.  I can't emphasize just how wrong I was.  I had decided just to do 2 miles to give my legs a bit of a rest after the 5 miles from the day before, and I started out at a pretty good pace.  I felt okay for about the first half mile, and then things started to go downhill fast.  This wasn't an unusual pace for me for 2 miles, but I felt like I was dying.  Like I was really putting a lot of effort into it and could barely keep up.  My head congestion got worse (not better), and my whole body was feeling exhausted.  The 2 miles couldn't be over soon enough. When it was, I just sat down on the floor and leaned back against the treadmill, completely skipping any type of stretching simply because it would take more effort than I had left in me right then.  I felt pretty pathetic, to be honest.  But the longer I sat there, the worse I felt.  I had to accept the fact that this head congestion was the start of a wonderful cold (hopefully not the flu!), and that I might have to take it easy for a few days.  I finally headed upstairs, changed right into my pajamas (it was already past 10:30pm anyway, so I didn't feel so lame), took some night-time cold medicine, and promptly fell asleep on the couch.  I didn't have anywhere to be this morning, so I didn't set an alarm, and vowed to sleep as long as I could to give my body some rest and maybe tone down the severity of the on-coming cold.  I still feel kinda crappy today, but not yet a full-blown cold or flu.  I'm gonna have to do some research on the best way for runners to deal with colds and congestion.  Is it best to just tone down the intensity of my runs, or to skip a couple days altogether until I clear up?  I can't believe this is the first time I've encountered this!

Anyhow, I need to head to the grocery store (and maybe pick up some orange juice while I'm there to help combat this cold) to stock up on some ingredients for healthy meals now that all the Christmas and holiday meals and leftovers are gone.  I honestly can't wait to get back to cooking for me and my husband, because I was shocked by how terrible I felt after a few days of eating what other people prepared (I mean no disrespect to any of them, by the way - the food was all fantastic, but just not in my range of normal meals anymore).  I didn't binge or eat only unhealthy foods.  In fact, I still ate a normal breakfast every day, and did a pretty good job of taking smaller portions of the meals I didn't prepare, and didn't over-do it too much on the desserts.  But I seriously couldn't believe how crappy I felt.  I was sluggish, my stomach felt gross, and I started to have very little appetite.  When I did get hungry, I noticed that I felt like I was craving sweets, but the minute I started to eat them, I felt all gross again.  And if I then tried to force down an apple or something healthier, I felt so full it was disgusting.  I eventually managed to stay away from the sweets so much and leave the leftovers to my husband (even if that meant making my own salad for dinner and letting some of the leftovers go to waste), and I started to feel so much better.  And now that things are settling back into a more normal routine, I can start cooking again.  :o)  Can't wait! Now if I could just get this head congestion to go away... 

Christmas Eve Running!

Happy Christmas Eve! What a great day for a run, right? :o) Ok, maybe not - I mean there's church, family and friends getting together, family dinners, last minute baking and gift wrapping, and that panicked trip to the store because you forgot something. But that was exactly why I purposely scheduled time to run today. I knew I needed a break from all that chaos, and running would help me relax and re-energize.

So over the last few weeks I've been trying to stock up on cold weather running gear since this will be my first winter attempting to run outside. I bought tights and running gloves in addition to the various Under Armour shirts and sweatshirts I'd collected over the years. And to my joy, friends and family actually bought me running stuff for Christmas this year (which, by the way, totally makes me feel validated as a runner - come on, if everyone else thinks I am... Haha!). So from my running gifts, I ended up with two cold weather running headbands and a hat too. I was now officially ready to run outside in cold weather - no more excuses! I ripped off all the tags from my new gear, got all gussied up (and took a silly picture to commemorate the occasion), and headed out the door. I was shocked by the cold at first, but have been told and have read that you should dress for 20 degrees warmer, so I figured I was doing okay. (I ended up being dressed perfectly by the time I was done! Go me!)

I made sure to warm up my legs a little more than usual, and took off running. It felt so so good to be back outside. The first thing I noticed was a complete shock though. After so much running on the treadmill, my stride outside actually felt awkward for the first few steps! And to think I thought it was all a myth when they said treadmill running changes your stride. They're not kidding, people!!!! Holy cow! But I quickly adjusted and I was on my way.

I'm not a fan of snow and cold - at all (good thing I live in Northeast Ohio, right?) - but I was enjoying being outside and running in nature anyway, so I tried to ignore it and focus on the positives. I was also afraid that the temps in the mid 30's would be hard for me to breathe, but I was surprisingly okay! (I did experience some slight congestion/sense of needing to cough for a couple hours afterward, but that's since gone away.) In top of that, there were also still some icy patches to battle and carefully tip toe through. So I tried to balance being careful without being ridiculous and slowing myself down unnecessarily. I thought I was doing pretty good, and then right before I hit the halfway point of my 4 mile run, it started to snow. And stick to the ground. Of course, it would be at my farthest point! Grrr... As I turned around and headed back, the snow was getting in my eyes, and I was afraid it would be slippery. I think I was more cautious than necessary, because by the time I was done, I was pretty disappointed in my time of 37:51. I was frustrated and threw my keys on the ground, effectively breaking my miniature flashlight, and stood there glaring at it. I was under no delusion that coming back outside would take some adjusting to. And I knew that it would be hard to properly pace myself the same without a digital display staring me in the face. But I didn't think it would slow me down by almost 2 full minutes compared to my best time inside. Apparently I have a lot of adjusting left to do. I picked up the keys and pieces of my flashlight and headed back home. In the end, I decided not to let it bother me too much. I still ran, and I still had a great tome doing it. And I got to try out all my new gear - which worked fantastically by the way! Even in the snow! :o)

Tomorrow is still another day - another day to continue to improve, to teach myself new things, and to push my limits. And it's Christmas!!!! So off to bed for this girl! Merry Christmas everyone!!!!!

A Personal Victory and Keeping the Streak Alive

We're 10 days away from Christmas now, and things are as hectic as ever at this point.  But I'm still finding ways to fit in my daily run every day!  I cut it pretty close last night though - I went out shopping right after work, and because I was so far behind on my Christmas shopping, I just kept going from store to store, not really realizing what time it was.  Suddenly I'm in the checkout line at Target, and their announcing that they're closing in 10 minutes.  Wait - what?!?!  But Target closes at 11:00pm this time of year.  No....  First of all, I couldn't believe I was one of THOSE people - the people who are there when the employees are trying to close the store.  Especially when the store is open until 11:00pm.  Ridiculous.  I felt terrible.  On top of that, it was 11:00pm, I was still in the store almost half an hour from home, and I hadn't run yet! 

I drove home as fast as I could while still being safe, got changed into my running clothes, and was standing on the treadmill by 11:50pm.  I opted to only run 1 mile (since it was almost midnight), and although I didn't FINISH my run before midnight, I had started it before midnight, and to me, that counted as my Friday run.  The thought crossed my mind that technically I didn't run a whole mile on Friday, but this Holiday Running Streak wasn't about the technicalities of a couple minutes.  I could have easily came home at 11:45pm last night and just said forget it; it was too late; I was tired from a long day of work and fighting holiday crowds and traffic.  But I didn't.  I put on my running shoes and got on the treadmill at 11:50pm to run my mile for the day.  And that's what it's about.  For me at least.

And today I accomplished another personal goal of mine.  Even after another long day of shopping (at least I slept in today), I came home and ran again.  It wasn't nearly as late as Friday, and I was deciding between 3 or 4 miles.  I started running and just decided to make the choice depending on how I was feeling as I approached the 3 mile mark.  I was feeling pretty good, and I was running at a really good pace, so I kept on going.  I'd been working on improving my 4 mile time and had been closing in on the 36:00 mark, but I couldn't quite get to 36:00 yet.  36 minutes would have meant 9 minute miles.  When I first started running and was running 2 miles, my pace was around 14:00 or 14:30 per mile.  So I'd been more than thrilled when I got down to about 10 minute miles or a little under.  To me, that was fantastic.  I know to runners that 10 minute miles are probably on the slow end, but it was a threshold I'd been aiming for as a personal validation of myself as a runner.  So when I reached that goal earlier this summer and was comfortable there, I think I stopped pushing myself as hard.  But I recently started pushing again, and have been closing in on the 9 minute mile mark.  Today, I hit that mark.  I finished my 4 mile run in 35:53.  Yes, it was on the treadmill, so there's some doubt about whether I could do that outside on my own.  But for now, I'm okay with that.  I want to rejoice in my own little personal victory for a bit.  I stood there on the treadmill, walking for my cool-down, thinking about the fact that I'd just run 4 mile at a pace under 9 minutes per mile.  9 minutes.  To be honest, that was something I never thought I'd see.  10 minute miles had been a huge victory in my mind.  And I guess I'd thought that would be the end of it.  So to accomplish this, even if it was inside on a treadmill, was pretty big for me. 

Forget the fact that I could already feel my muscles were sore while I was still on the treadmill cooling down.  I'll just have an easier run tomorrow, and rejoice in my victory a little longer.  For now, I'm heading to bed.  Off to dream about my lightning fast speed.  Haha!  Maybe someday!  :o)

I'm Back!

Holy cow!  I can't believe how long it's been since I've written.  Things have just been crazy hectic around here lately, between the year-end rush at work before the dam breaks in January, to birthdays and Christmas get-togethers, and friends coming home from out of town, I feel like I barely have time to breathe.  I'm getting up earlier than usual in the mornings so I can get into work a bit early and get more done, I'm staying there later, then we have all these things after work on weekdays and weekends alike, and it's all I can do to squeeze in my running, let alone write about it.  And when it comes down to choosing between running and writing about running, I'm going to make the smart choice and run.

I'm not going to lie.  I'm exhausted.  I've barely finished my Christmas decorating, barely started my Christmas shopping, don't even have a single Christmas card written out, am falling further and further behind at work, and the house is a mess while bills are dangerously close to being late and things like the deadline for deciding between two different health insurance plans are looming over my head, closer each day.  I've run out of clean bath towels and am picking out my clothes from the clean laundry basket because they haven't made it back into the drawers and closets yet.  I've cried and broken down more than once in the last few weeks.  And sometimes what pushes me over the edge is something as dumb as realizing that the pineapple I'm trying to grow in OHIO in the middle of winter is most likely dead after all my hard work on it this summer. 

And I know you're all laughing at me right now.  But I stress out easily.  Which is also dnagerous for me, because I'm a very emotional eater.  But you know what?  Despite my messy house, my lack of cards and gifts for Christmas, and my ever-growing to-do list, I've still managed to run at least a mile every single day.  I haven't broken my Holiday Running Streak since Thanksgiving.  I've changed my priorities and let some other things fall by the wayside a bit.  And I've had to get a little creative sometimes in order to squeeze in a run.  I've gone out to dinner or restaurants without washing my hair after very sweaty runs (don't worry, I at least showered the rest of me), I've started my runs after 10:00pm at night, and I almost ruined a surprise party for a friend because I was late after insisting I needed to run between work and the party.  But again - I ran every day. 

What's even more surprising is that I've made some significant improvements and breakthroughs over the last few weeks.  You'd usually think that I'd just be coasting along running only a mile every day to fulfill my requirement for the Holiday Running Streak.  But that's just not how I'm built.  Instead, I know how much time I have from the minute I step on the treadmill or walk out the door to the minute I need to be back upstairs or back in the house, and if that means I have to run faster than usual to get in the same distance, then I'm going to push myself to run faster.  Believe it or not, being pressed for time is apparently very beneficial for finding out that you've been holding yourself back!  I consistently run my 4 mile route faster and faster every time, improving all the time.  And on the days that I run less than 4 miles, I realize that if I can run 4 miles at that pace, then I can run 2 or 3 miles in a pace that's faster than my 4 mile pace.  I've shaved off over 2:30 from my original 4 mile time (and it's only been a few weeks that I've been attempting to run that distance),  and I'm now running 4 miles at a pace faster than I used to run my 5k route.  So when I realized that, I decided it was time to try really pushing myself on a 5k route (keep in mind, this is all being done on a treadmill inside - it's dark in the morning when I leave for work and dark when I walk out of the office to come home, and my trail and neighborhood are both too dark for my liking - so it all comes with a little asterisk in my mind.  I feel like it doesn't really count until I prove to myself that I can do it outside too.)  Anyhow, I decided to really push myself on a 5k route the other day and ended up running it in 27:22.  WAY better than I'd ever run this distance before.  In fact, after I thought about it for awhile, it was even faster than the time it took me to run just 2 miles when I first started out (approximately 28:30).  What an eye opener!  I always feel like I'm not very good at running, and that I'm not really progressing much.  Probably because (even though I know I shouldn't) I compare myself to others.  But when I realize that a pace around 9:30 is now comfortable for me for 4 miles, and that I can run 3.1 miles in less time than it used to take me to run just 2 miles, I'm infinitely proud of myself.  So what if someone else is running faster than me or trying a half marathon when I am intimidated by the thought of a 10k this summer?  I've come a long way - and I'm going to keep pushing myself.  And I need to learn to be content with that, regardless of what everyone else around me is doing. 

But alas, I've let time get away from me, and now it's going to be another late night.  (I still have to do laundry!)  So I'm facing another day of being exhausted and behind tomorrow - AGAIN.  But at least I'll know I have a run to look forward to when I get home from work! 

Unexpected Challenges

So far so good with my Holiday Running Streak - I've managed to run 1 mile or more every day since Thanksgiving so far!  Yippee!!!  I rarely run every day, so I was a little concerned about whether or not I'd be able to keep up with this, but it's honestly been easier than I thought.  1 mile is like 10-15 minutes of my day, so even if I'm in a hurry, there's no reason I can't spare that small amount of time, right? 

The part I wasn't expecting was my apparent inability to take it easy every now and then once I get outside on the trail or hop on the treadmill.  Tonight was supposed to be my rest day because I haven't really taken one since I started this streak.  I was a starting to get a little worried that I might injure myself by not resting, so I tried to be serious about the rest day today.  Gaaaahhhh!!!!  I vowed not to run over 1 mile, and to take it slow.  I stepped onto the treadmill and walked to warm up, then set the pace to a nice even 6 mph for myself.  As I started running, though, I had one of those out-of-body experiences where I could see my own hand reach out and bump up the incline on the treadmill, even though my mind was yelling at it and scolding me.  My head was saying "go slow", but my hand (aka my competitive side) was hyperventilating at the thought of not giving it my all.  And so I ran my slower, shorter run for my rest day at an increased incline.  ....Sigh..... 

At least it was better than my attempt at an easy day earlier this week.  I have been running 4 miles now, so I was just going to run 1 mile, but make it intense.  I didn't want to over-do it on the distance; I'd heard that runners shouldn't increase their weekly mileage more than 10% per week, which meant, I couldn't run 4 miles every day.  So 1 mile it was.  To satisfy myself, I was going to make it a hard mile though and really go all out.  I took off at 7mph (the speed I usually try to end my runs on as my last-ditch push), and it felt fast.  Really fast.  I felt like I was sprinting.  As I ran/sprinted, I quickly figured out in my nerdy accountant brain that I'd finish my mile in around 8:30 at this pace.  Wait - what?!?!?!?!  I'd never run a mile that fast in my life.  Sweet!  Now I had to do it.  Because that would be totally awesome.  :o) 

The only problem was, that my crazy lady mind thought it would be even more awesome if I could keep that pace for 2 miles.  Because that would mean I would run 2 miles in around 17 minutes.  17 minutes!  Yes, you read that correctly.  (My previous best for 2 miles was somewhere in the upper 18 minute range.)  That seemed so completely outrageous to me, that I decided I was going to do it.  I was dying, but I could make it.  I mean, I had to be almost 1 mile in by now.  Except when I looked down, it was way closer to a half mile in - and I already couldn't breathe.  I wasn't going to make it 2 miles like this.  But 17 minutes!!!  That was more than 11 minutes faster than I could run 2 miles when I first started running.  It would be AMAZING!  I looked down again.  Still not close to the 1 mile mark.  BREATHE!!!

I closed my eyes for a second, took a deep breath, relaxed my shoulders, and tried to convince myself that 7 mph was a nice, easy pace.  I wasn't sprinting.  I could do this.  I just needed to relax.  I opened my eyes, and although I wasn't much closer to reaching a mile, I felt better.  I alternated back and forth between relaxed and within inches of sure death, past the 1 mile mark, and past the 1.5 mile mark.  I was so close.  I couldn't give up now.  I just kept thinking of the 17 minutes.  I hadn't tortured my body for a mile and a half to give up now.  So I concentrated on breathing and relaxing rather than on my legs, which wanted to just give out.  I started counting down the tenths of a mile.  I couldn't even kick up the speed the last couple tenths of a mile, but I didn't care.  I was going to make it - and I did.  I ran 2 miles in 17:09 that day.  Despite the fact that I wanted to fall over the side of the treadmill in exhaustion or sit right down even though the belt was still going, I was full of smiles and felt fantastic!  I was pretty sore the next day too, but it was so worth it.  :o) 

Now I just have to keep the streak going for another few weeks until the end of the year (scary that it's so close, actually!), and I'll have conquered another goal in my running adventure.  I never thought I'd be where I'm at right now, and I have no idea where this journey will take me next.  But I'm excited to find out! 

Going Streaking!

I almost forgot!  I saw this great challenge on the internet the other day from Runner's World: the 2012 Runner's World Holiday Running Streak.  (2012 Runner's World Holiday Running Streak) 


The idea is to run at least 1 mile per day, every day, from Thanksgiving until New Year's day.  And I almost blew it on day 1 by not running today!  Haha!  I didn't run or work out yesterday, and I was SO not in the mood to do anything at all today other than sit on the couch - I didn't even get out of my pajamas until 4:00pm when my parents were on their way over to eat some leftovers.  I was in that danger zone of trying to rationalize not running or exercising today either when I was browsing my Pinterest page and happened to catch a glimpse of my own pin for this Running Streak Challenge.  Holy cow!  How could I fail on day 1 of a challenge I'd decided to commit to?  Pretty lame.  I couldn't handle being that lousy person who gives up before they even start, so I sighed, mustered up all my strength, and got off the couch to change into my running clothes.  I went downstairs and did my push-ups for the day (from the Hundred Push-Ups Challenge I'm also doing), and then stared at the treadmill.  Ugh.  My head hurt and I just wanted to go back upstairs to be honest.  As I stood there contemplating my next move, I thought, what the heck - 1 mile is only like 10 minutes.  Could I really not suck it up for less than 10 minutes?  So I got on the treadmill and decided I'd just run for 2 miles today.  The thought of 4 miles again today was daunting.  I was already tired, and I think the length of the 4 mile run was what was scaring me away.  2 miles would be under 20 minutes - I could handle that.  And it would help me keep (start) my streak for the Holiday Running Streak challenge.

So I decided that if I was only going to run 2 miles, I'd at least make it worthwhile and run fast.  Plus, it would be over quicker that way!  Haha!  I ended up finishing the 2 miles in 18:12 - a personal best - and starting off my streak on a good note.

Who's going to join me?  This will help keep me motivated and on track during the holidays, and after all, 10-15 minutes to run or walk one mile really isn't so bad.  If I can't spare 10 minutes of my bad, that's a pretty lame excuse.  That's worth waking up 10 minutes early for just to keep the streak going!  Let's go streaking!!  :o) 

Happy Thanksgiving!

I feel like I'm finally beginning to recover from the chaos of Thanksgiving yesterday.  For some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to cook Thanksgiving dinner myself this year rather than making the endless driving tour back and forth between different family members' houses all day long like we end up doing every holiday.  I thought it would be so nice just to stay at home and enjoy my holiday by having all the family come to us.  I think I severely underestimated the amount of work that goes into cooking a Thanksgiving dinner for 11 people - and the amount of space in my oven.  Nevertheless, I pulled it off, even if my back was sore from standing on kitchen tile for 8+ hours and my feet and ankles were pulsing with so much pain and soreness that it was keeping me from sleeping even though I was really tired.  And I was right - it actually WAS really nice to have everyone over our house for once.

And because I was in charge of the menu, I decided to take advantage of that and make it a healthier Thanksgiving than I could get somewhere else.  I was bound and determined to show my family members that I could make a fantastic Thanksgiving dinner my way and that they wouldn't even miss all the fat, butter, etc. that is usually synonymous with the holiday.  I spent a good deal of time searching for a healthy turkey recipe and some healthy side dishes to go along with it and was finally set.  The whole menu would feature only 2 tablespoons of butter - risky, I know, but I was hoping it was going to be worth it.  Here is a list of the recipes I used:

•  Herb Roasted Turkey
• Healthy Stuffing
• Herb Roasted Potatoes
• Green Beans with Miso and Almonds
• Lemon Thyme-Tinged Corn
• Ratatouille Polenta Bake
• Fruit Turkey(haha - this was just something silly)
• Whole Wheat Penne Pasta
• Salad

I'm going to be completely honest here - I had NO idea what to expect out of these recipes.  And I was going to serve them to 10 other people.  My husband has been great about being my guinea pig, and I guess I've gotten so used to cooking things for him that I've never made before that I didn't even give it a second thought for Thanksgiving dinner.  I just made sure to give everyone their fair warning that the pasta was the only thing I'd ever made before on the menu!  And although I burnt a tiny corner of the stuffing and one part of the turkey didn't quite cook enough, it wasn't the end of the world.  I actually got quite a few compliments on the food!  I don't know if they were just trying to be nice and/or grateful that someone else had taken on the task of cooking Thanksgiving dinner, but I don't think anything turned out terribly.  A surprise star of the show was actually the ratatouille polenta bake.  This was the side dish I was most worried about.  I've never worked with polenta before and this really was a new adventure for me.  I opted just to make the recipe in the amount it called for, even though it was only for 6 servings; that way, I would only waste a small amount when it bombed.  Surprise!!!  Everyone loved it!!!!!!!!!!  Of course, right?!?!?  And here is a picture of my own version of the fruit turkey:



Cute, right?  I love it, but then again, I tend to have an odd sense of humor!  :o)  Otherwise, I think there were a couple things I would improve upon the next time around (the herbs on the potatoes were a little strong, but then again I was doubling the recipe; and the stuffing wasn't quite as flavorful as I was hoping), but I didn't poison anyone, and no one was sitting around feeling like they were in a health food store.  If nothing else, I at least stood my ground and was able to show everyone that healthy food can still be good - and that you might not even realize it's healthy - and it doesn't have to be a tofu turkey. 

On the downside, I failed to get in a run or any other type of workout on Thanksgiving.  I promised myself I'd be sure to take a break and get in at least a mile or a plank and some push-ups.  But I was having a hard enough time trying to wrangle the platters in and out of the oven, juggle pots and pans on the stove, and getting everything ready on time, that I was sweating from the intensity of the chaos.  And the fact that it was 77 degrees in the house even though we had the windows and door open, and the a/c on at 70 degrees.  And by the time dinner was over, everyone was gone, and the clean-up was under way, it was all I could do just to get the dishes washed and tables torn down.  I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I actually dragged one of the kitchen chairs over to the sink and sat on it to finish the last of the dishes!!!!  Hahaha!  My feet and ankles were so sore that running was definitely out of the question.  And then I made the mistake of sitting down on the couch - and couldn't get up after that.  Total fail in the workout department yesterday.  Which means I better get my butt off the couch now and go do something!

Injured Abs and Broken Cars

So it's my day off work, and I had grand plans to sleep in, relax, and get myself ready to host Thanksgiving at my house.  Yes - I'm hosting Thanksgiving this year - first time for everything, right?  I'm surprised, though, because I'm not even a bit nervous about cooking for 11 people.  All this experimenting I've done with cooking over the past year has really given me a strange confidence in cooking new recipes!  I've never in my life cooked a turkey (just watched my mother and grandma cook theirs), and I've only made one of the other side dishes I'm planning for that day.  Yet - no nerves whatsoever.  In fact, I'm excited!  (For anyone who knows me well, the thought of me being excited to cook for 11 people is mind-boggling.)  But seriously - I can't wait to show everyone how awesome my healthy cooking can be!  Sad, I know - but these are the kinds of things that get me stoked nowadays.  :o)

Anyhow, instead of sleeping in, I've been awake since 6:00am, tossing and turning, and finally got out of bed at 7:30.  Not only were there a thousand things running through my mind about Thanksgiving, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, etc., but I couldn't stop thinking about the impending doom from the car service shop that was headed my way this week.  My husband's truck died on his way to work yesterday, and my dad and I were able to figure out that the fuel pump is bad and needs replacing.  Now my dad is pretty handy when it comes to fixing cars, but he just doesn't have the right tools and equipment for this job, so we had to take it in to the shop.  Ugh.  If there's one thing I hate, it's the thought of car service shops.  Especially as a girl.  Those service guys automatically assume they can pull one over on you because you're female.  Never mind that I know how to change my own oil, rotate my tires, identify headers on a hot rod, etc etc.  I must obviously lack car knowledge because of my gender, right?  (Read with heavy sarcasm...)  Grrrr.  My dad also estimated for me that the repair would probably cost anywhere from $400 - $800.  Ouch.  Not something I'm looking forward to, especially right before the holidays. 

On top of all that, I was so uncomfortable that I couldn't fall back to sleep.  I'm not sure exactly what I did, but at some point yesterday or in the last couple days, I must have over-done something, and injured a muscle in my abs.  I first noticed it last night.  I had run really hard on the treadmill yesterday evening and not had time to properly cool down and stretch, since I was trying to be on time to pick up my husband from work (the other joys of the truck being out of commission).  Later last night, I got ready to do my exhaustion test for the Hundred Push Ups Challenge after completing Week 2.  I got in plank position, noticing that my abs felt tighter and more sore than usual, but didn't really think anything of it.  Until I got to push-up number 4 and felt a stabbing pain in my right side mid-ab muscles.  I held myself up for a few seconds and took a deep breath, then attempted another push up, only to feel the same stabbing pain.  I'm not talking sore muscle pain here, folks.  I can deal with that and push through it for a few push ups.  I've never experienced this before.  So I tried to make the safe choice and postpone my exhaustion test.  I laid down to stretch out my abs and vowed to try again the next day.  Maybe I just needed some rest and was over-doing it with the push ups challenge, the hard run today, and a plank a day.  Unfortunately, the pain has yet to go away.  It's not that I feel it every minute of every day, but normal activities like going from sitting to laying, laying to sitting, or bending at the waist to pick something up produce the same sharp pain.  So while I'm tossing and turning in bed this morning, I got the stabbing pain in my abs every time I tried to move myself into a different position.  It just wasn't working.  So I got out of bed, even though I feel like a zombie right now.  I have more than enough to do this week to keep me busy, but a nice day of sleeping in sure would have felt nice.

On the positive side, my run yesterday was fantastic.  I was in a hurry because I knew I had to pick up my husband, so I set the treadmill to a pretty decent pace.  I was feeling good, and about a mile in, I went to check the time and realized I didn't have my watch on, my cell phone was upstairs charging, and there wasn't a clock anywhere in the basement.  Crap.  I started racking my brain to remember what time I'd ventured downstairs.  I knew it was after 7:00pm, but how far after that?  I needed to leave the house by 8:00pm, but I also wanted to get in 3.5 miles, and I'd already used up 5 minutes on warming up before starting my run.  So I settled on the fact that I'd started my warm up at 7:15pm (a nice conservative guess in my opinion), and from there realized I needed to hurry if I planned on changing out of my sweaty workout clothes before leaving the house!  So I kicked it up a notch, and every time I got tired, I reminded myself that I really really wanted to get in 3.5 miles (since today is supposed to be the day I transition to 3.75 miles), and that I was limited on time.  There was no room for slacking.  Too bad if I couldn't breathe or my legs were tired.  And you know what?  It totally worked!  Haha!  I finished 3.5 miles in record time, hopped off the treadmill without cooling down, skipped the stretching (I know I know - both mortal running sins!  don't kill me!), and ran upstairs to change and head out the door (still sweating, actually).  But despite the rushing around, I felt awesome.  It was a great run, I was exhausted and worn out, which meant I was smiling and refreshed.

Hopefully I can get over whatever is aggravating my ab muscles ASAP now.  I am a firm believer in resting if you're injured, but I'm making such good progress in my running, planks, and push ups that I hate to see it all disappear.  :o(  Think happy, healing thoughts for me!  I'm off to the grocery store and to run some errands.  Hoping to get outside and run today too, since it's supposed to be in the 50's! (Heat wave - lol!)  Have a great day!

The Good, the Bad, and the Impromptu Rest Day

I had a great run on Monday this week - I ran pretty fast, and I felt pretty fantastic both during the run and when I was done.  So I couldn't wait to get back on the treadmill Tuesday night.  All last week I'd been noticing a little soreness in my legs during the day, especially in my upper inner thighs.  I didn't want to over-do it on Monday, but I felt good, so I wasn't too concerned.  I just focused on stretching a lot better and longer Monday night.  No soreness Tuesday during the day, so I hopped right back on the treadmill, ready to run another 3.5 miles in an awesome time.

I'm not sure what happened, but last night was just one of those runs that doesn't feel good at all.  I wasn't running as fast, but I felt like I was running so much harder than usual.  The treadmill was set on a pace and incline I should be able to handle and have handled in the past.  I've handled harder.  But not last night.  I was exhausted only a mile in.  My legs were tired, I was breathing heavily, and every time I looked down at the treadmill display, only a tenth of a mile had passed, even though it felt like an eternity since the last time I looked.  I tried speeding up the pace a bit, trying to make the miles go by more quickly, but I only ended up slowing down to walk for a sec.  Well that backfired.

I still went the whole 3.5 miles, but was disappointed.  Not only was I slow, but I felt terrible.  I guess it was just one of those days, and I decided not to put too much stock in it.  Well I slept terribly last night, and probably only got 4 and a half hours of sleep (if that); combined with my terrible run yesterday and sore legs today, I made what I consider a logical and educated decision to make today my rest day.  And of course, I ate a sub sandwich and cookie for lunch instead of the healthy spinach salad, greek yogurt, and blackberries I had brought with me; I totally caved when everyone was discussing the type of sandwich they were ordering from my favorite sub shop.  So needless to say, I'm not expecting much from the scale tomorrow morning!

On a more positive note, I made a pretty cool dinner tonight.  I stole it from one of the Weight Watchers cookbooks I bought (I feel that even though I'm not doing the Weight Watchers program, there's no reason I can't use the recipes, right?), and it's called Hungarian Style Pork Chops with Baby Spinach (recipe here: Hungarian Style Pork Chops with Baby Spinach).  I had no idea what to expect from this recipe, since it was one of the ones that didn't have a picture (I hate that!), but it sounded pretty easy, which is always a big factor in my decisions of what to make.  :o)  So I dug through the freezer this morning and pulled out what I thought looked like pork chops to thaw.  To be honest, I wasn't sure it was pork.  These chops were huge, and I'd already taken them out of the store packaging, so there wasn't a label to refer to.  Oh well - I guess if I was wrong, it wouldn't be the end of the world.  Looked like we were having Hungarian Style Mystery Meat with Baby Spinach.  Haha!  Turns out I was right, and it really was pork (whew!).  And it was pretty darn good too!  Different than the things I usually make, but in a good way.  I took a picture, but it really doesn't do it justice, so I won't bother to share it here!  I don't want to bias anyone's opinion.

So after dinner I was feeling guilty about not running or at least doing my Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred workout.  I decided I at least needed to do my scheduled push-ups workout from the Hundred Push-Ups Challenge.  I've made it to week 2 day 2, and I'm not going to lie - I'm struggling.  I'm barely keeping up, and it's getting harder very quick!  I can honestly say though, that I've noticed an improvement in the number of push-ups I can do consecutively.  My max in my initial fitness test was 8, and now 8 seems fairly easy.  I've made it up to 14 today on my last set for my max!  Still just barely keeping up with where the program says I should be, but I'm going to be proud of my improvement anyway.  :o)

Well, they say sleep is an important part of your health, so I guess I should probably get in bed early tonight - maybe try to catch up on some of that sleep I lost last night.  Hopefully I'm recovered and feeling better enough tomorrow to get back on that treadmill.  Sweet running dreams!

Hundred Push-Ups Week 1 and Crock Pot Halibut Stew

Well, I'm officially done with week 1 of the hundred push-ups challenge I started, and I'm surprised to already be seeing some improvements.  I'll be honest - as I was completing day 1 of week 1, and even the next morning, I was pleasantly surprised.  It didn't seem so bad while I was actually doing the push-ups, and I was only mildly sore the next morning.  As the day went on though, more and more muscles began to ache, and the aches all kept getting worse.  I was struggling to put on my jacket or change my clothes by the time work was over.  I was certainly humbled at that point!  I had sore muscles in places that I didn't even know I had muscles to begin with.  I'll admit - it was tempting to throw in the towel and say I wasn't cut out for it.  But why give up after just the first day?  I couldn't do that.  I just convinced the hubby to give me an extra long back massage that night and the next, and made sure to really focus on stretching out those muscles.  I was on a Monday, Wednesday, Friday schedule for the program, so when Wednesday rolled around, I woke up still feeling quite sore, but not nearly as bad as the evening before - I could at least wash my hair and put on my own coat!  I made sure to really stretch out my upper body after work on Wednesday, and even though I was skeptical (and a bit afraid of hurting myself), I headed down to the basement to do my push-ups before my run.  I'm not going to lie - I was still sore.  And it hurt while I was doing the push-ups this time.  But you know what - I still did them.  On the 5th and last set each day, you're supposed to max out - do as many push-ups in a raw as you can without injuring yourself.  I couldn't do anymore than before this time, but I made it through day 2 of week 1 anyway.  No glory there, but lots of guts!  Lol! 

I felt surprisingly good on Thursday, despite all the anticipation of feeling just as terrible as I did on Tuesday.  Friday was super busy for me, and I was exhausted, so I opted to move my Friday push-ups to Saturday (completely acceptable according to the lay-out of the program).  Saturday's program was week 1 day 3, and it was intimidating.  I was schedule for sets of 8, 10, 7, 7, and a max of at least 10 or more.  I hadn't done more than 9 consecutive push-ups yet, so I was glad I'd decided to take the extra day to recover.  I truly surprised myself.  Not only did I make it through the first 4 sets as scheduled, but I did 12 consecutive push-ups on the 5th set for my max-out!  12!  I'm not sure if you saw that, so I'll say it again - 12!  I know this isn't really many, but for me it was.  And it meant I was already seeing improvement over my initial test (max of 8). 

I snuck a peek at week 2 day 1, which I'm scheduled to do tomorrow, and it's another intimidating one of 9, 11, 8, 8, and a max of at least 11. Whoa!  And by the end of week 2, I need to be able to do at least 15 on my max set.  Yikes.  I figure all I can do is try.  I don't really expect to be able to do 100 push-ups by the end of the program, so if I have to repeat a couple weeks, that's okay with me.  No matter what, I'm building up some muscle capacity in my upper body and core, which was the goal anyway.

On another note, since it was Sunday, I decided to bust out the Crock Pot again - it seems to be a Sunday favorite of mine.  This was the recipe I chose for today: Slow Cooker Halibut Stew.  There wasn't any halibut at the store, so I used cod instead, but I doubt that matters.  Now I'm not the most advanced in the kitchen, which means I don't have any suave and sassy knife chopping skills.  That being said - this prep took FOREVER!  Everything needed chopped or diced.  Some needed peeled first.  It probably took me twice as long as it should have, but it was finally all in the crockpot.  Whew.  I was actually a little ticked at this point because I wasn't really expecting much from this dish.  It was a stew of fish, after all, and I was only anticipating an average outcome.  Not worth it for all that prep.  HOWEVER, when dinner time rolled around, my husband and I got quite a shock.  This stuff was fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  It was even spicy, which we love!!!!!!  I thought for sure this was something he'd hate and offered him the option of eating some of the leftovers in the fridge from earlier this weekend.  But he tried it, and we were both amazed!  :o)  This immediately went on the "make again" list.  This was the picture from the website where I found the recipe, and the real outcome actually looked pretty similar:



So after the excitement and chaos of last week, I'm hoping to get fully back on track this week.  If the rest of my cooking this week is as good as that halibut (cod) stew I made tonight, it shouldn't be too hard.  I just need to stay away from the cookies...  :o)

On the Road (or More Accurately, the Bike Path) Again

I am just beyond excited.  My luck couldn't be better these last few days.  For the first time in a LONG time, the nicest weather of the whole week is falling on the weekend - which is huge, since it's now too dark to run outside after work.  Even better, I got out of work early on Friday and made it home well before sunset.  I couldn't believe my luck - after 3 straight days of continuing professional education training out of town, I was more than ready to let go and forget about it all with a good run.  A run outside would make it that much better.  I ran inside when I got home, checked the clock and the temperature, and quickly changed into some running gear without even bothering to bring my suitcase into the bedroom, let alone unpack it.  It was a bit chilly, so I threw on an under armour shirt just to be safe.  As I started out, my hands and face got pretty cold, but I didn't even care.  I was so caught up in the joy of being back outside that it didn't even phase me!  (Plus, they warmed up pretty quickly as I started to sweat!)

I was exhausted from those 3 long and boring days of work, but decided I was going to take full advantage of the opportunity and run the full 3.5 miles scheduled for today.  I was pretty sure I had the time before it got dark, so it was just a matter of my body making it.  To be honest, I didn't know how well this was going to go.  I'd just gone 3 full days without having much choice in my own diet for breakfast, lunch, dinner, or snacks, since they were all being provided, buffet-style, by the hotel/conference center we were staying at.  I did my best - with quite a few downfalls consisting of candy, a cookie, a soft pretzel, and even some popcorn - but was able to avoid burgers and hot dogs, white bread, butter-soaked vegetables, pizza, fried chicken, and taco meat.  Needless to say, there wasn't much of a selection left after ruling out those things, so I ended up eating a lot of lettuce.  Then, because I didn't have anything very filling or protein-packed, I'd start to get hungry and resort to the snacks and sweets that were available.  I had brought some of my own healthy snacks, including some whole grain crackers, apples, and organic chocolate bars, but those ran out pretty quickly, considering the circumstances.  All in all, I wasn't feeling so hot by Friday afternoon, and I was pretty sure my crappy diet was going to have a negative effect on my performance.

Leave it to me to prove myself wrong.  I'm not sure why, but I actually felt really good while I ran.  Maybe it was being outside; maybe it was letting go of the work week.  Who knows.  Whatever it was, I finished my 3.5 mile run in 32:59.  Oh yeah!  There I go, validating my treadmill times!  Haha!  As I walked to cool down, I was amazed at how awesome I felt.  I don't mean that I wasn't exhausted, because I was.  I mean that sense of accomplishment and satisfaction after a good run.  Reveling in my exhaustion and celebrating it.  For some reason, it dawned on me that this felt WAY better than it did when running inside on the treadmill.  All of a sudden, I remembered why I had become addicted to running in the first place - it was this feeling!

And so when today rolled around with a forecast of sun and mid-60's for a high, I couldn't wait to get back outside.  I had some stuff to clean up in the house while I waited for it to warm up, and then I tackled some yard-work I'd been putting off because of the cold and rain, but I raced through it all and got back out on the bike path, ready to run again.  This time, I ditched the under armour gear and was able to run in just shorts and a t-shirt - the warm(ish) air felt fantastic on my skin, and I was loving every minute of it.  I was only scheduled for 2 miles today, and although I wanted to run outside as much as I could, I stuck to the plan.  I could tell my legs were pretty tired from yesterday and I didn't want to over-do it  After all, tomorrow's still supposed to have some awesome weather, so I can take a longer run tomorrow again!  I finished my 2 miles today with another fantastic time (18:56) - just short of a personal best, and then walked another mile just to enjoy the nice weather.

I also found some time to try another new, healthy recipe.  I know the hubby puts up with a lot from me and has had to give up some of his favorite meals that I won't make anymore, so I was so excited to see a healthy recipe for barbequed pulled pork sandwiches, which he loves!  There was no actual barbeque sauce involved in this recipe (Chipotle Pulled-Pork Sandwiches), so I was a bit skeptical, but I figured it was worth a shot.



I was even pleasantly surprised by the amazing smell in the house when I walked inside after being out for a couple hours while it cooked in the Crock Pot.  Yum!  I just hoped it was going to taste that good.  Now, I'm going to be honest here -  I didn't buy the organic tomato sauce the recipe called for.  I saw it in the store, but opted instead for a low sodium non-organic version because I was shocked at the amount of sodium in the organic brand.  I also had absolutely no idea what the recipe meant by "chipotle chiles in adobo sauce" in a 7 oz can.  I'm not even kidding when I tell you I spent half an hour in the grocery store looking for this.  I walked up and down all the food aisles twice.  I must have looked ridiculous.  All I was able to find were some chopped green chiles with all the taco ingredients, and I'm not sure that's what I was supposed to get.  I don't think it ruined the end result, which I was pretty happy with.  I will say that the sandwiches weren't as flavorful or spicy as when made with barbeque sauce, but they were still good.  And we were both happy, because I had my healthy sandwich, and my husband simply added some barbeque sauce from the fridge over his before eating it.  Success!  I'd probably make this again too, but I need to think of a better way to make it spicy and more barbeque-like - without ruining the healthy result. 

Well, I think it's finally time for bed for me.  I've had a long week, and with all this hotel staying, weather changes, and bad diet choices, my body can't decide if it's getting a head cold or not.  I'd MUCH rather it not, so I'm trying to be sure I get enough sleep!  Sweet running dreams!

3.5 Miles and 100 Push Ups

Mondays.  Blah.  Mondays after a week off work - even more blah.  But such is life - bills must be paid, so off to work I went today, mourning the end of my time off.  As expected, it was an exhausting return to the office, and I came home feeling quite drained. But as I packed up my stuff and headed out the door, I was hit with the realization that it was suddenly pitch black outside already.  And no, I wasn't leaving work late.  I was leaving at 5:30pm just like every other day.  Oh the fun of living in Northeast Ohio in the fall when the daylight savings time change hits.  I was now faced with the reality that running outside after work was officially over for me until the spring.  Heck, doing anything outside after work was over until the spring.  Cue: the treadmill.  I have a feeling the treadmill and I are going to become quick friends.

Even though I was exhausted, I was excited to get home and hop on that treadmill.  To run the day off and relax a little.  My plan to increase my distance to 4 miles had me trying 3.5 at a time again this week, and I was looking forward to it.  But before I got going, I had some push ups to do.  Over time, the more I've focused on running, the more I've noticed the toning and muscle in my arms and upper body diminishing.  I've been neglecting them and thinking for awhile now that it's about time I do something about it.  Last week while perusing some of my favorite motivational pages on Facebook, I came across an individual that was starting a challenge called the Hundred Push Ups Challenge.   The premise is that by the end of the 7 week program, anyone should be able to perform 100 consecutive push ups.  This seemed amazing to me, and I continued to read on.  Looking over the plan, it really didn't look too bad, and there were different plans for different fitness levels, depending on how many push ups someone could do consecutively before starting the program.  I was pretty sure I'd fall into the 0-5 push ups level for this initial test and would have to do one of the modified versions throughout the challenge.  I admit - I was intrigued.  So on Saturday, I decided to take the initial test - just to see how many consecutive regular push ups I could do (no modified versions).  I ended up surprising myself with 8!  And these were true push ups.  No knees, no bench.  I'm not sure if I had the absolute best form or if I was going down quite far enough for the last few, but I was pleasantly surprised.  At that point, my mind had been made up for me.  I was going to try this challenge.  Somehow I don't think I'll be able to complete 100 consecutive push ups by the end of it, but even more than 8 would be pretty fantastic.  I basically have to do the challenge now because I'm curious to see the outcome!  :o)

So before I hopped on the treadmill, I got down on the floor and followed the plan for week 1, day 1 of the challenge for my initial fitness level.  It was 5 sets of push ups - 2 sets of 6, 2 sets of 4, and then 1 set of the max possible - with 60 seconds of rest in between each set.  My max this time was 9.  You can see the whole plan and try it for yourself here: One Hundred Push Ups Challenge.  If I follow the plan and do my push ups every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I'll be done right before Christmas.  I can't wait to see how many push ups I can do by then!  I tried to get the hubby to try it with me, but he just looks at me like I'm out of my mind.  :o)



I felt surprisingly good for doing this many push ups, and with my spirits soaring, I got right to my run.  I felt really good.  I was forgetting that I was tired from my first day back in the office, and the time was going by pretty quickly.  I started to pick up the pace and ended up completing the 3.5 miles in just over 33 minutes.  Not too shabby!  I was tired, but feeling good about myself.  As I cooled down, I realized that I wasn't overly stressed in the cardio department; I mean, I was breathing heavy, but not so much that I didn't recover pretty quickly.  Whereas my legs, on the other hand, were very tired.  I'm going to pay more attention to my legs and breathing the rest of this week, but I'm thinking that I might need to adjust my plan to increase my distance.  I know I ran more than usual last week because I was on vacation, so maybe my muscles are still recovering from that.  Either way, I might need to stick with 3.5 miles longer than this week if I really want my body to adjust properly.  I'd so much rather adjust my original plan than injure myself.  In the mean time, I'll just keep on running...  :oD

A Small Victory! :oD

So I know I just wrote 2 hours ago, but I'm so excited that I just had to share!  After my earlier post, I headed downstairs to take a run on the treadmill.  Since it was already 10:00pm at that point, I decided I would just run 2 miles tonight and then make sure I ran 3.5 tomorrow.  But to make it seem worth my while, I'd really push it for those 2 miles.  So I got on the treadmill and set it at a pace to beat my previous personal best of 18:59.  Well....as I was approaching the 2 mile mark, I couldn't help but realize I still felt incredibly good for running at that pace.  So - I decided to keep on going.  I told myself I'd at least get to 2.5 miles and then see how I felt. 

Well I got to 2.5 miles and just couldn't give up at that point.  I'm such a sucker for competition.  I was getting pretty tired, but in my mind, the hardest part was over - I only had 1 more mile to go.  I could do that, right?  Well, I wasn't so sure but decided to try it anyway.  I don't think my legs have been so tired in a long time, and I honestly thought about slowing down, walking, or outright quitting a couple times.  But I couldn't disappoint myself like that.  Plus, I knew if I slowed down or walked for a few seconds, I'd probably ruin my pace from then on out.  I just had to suck it up and stick it out the rest of the way.  And guess what?  I did!  I even picked up the pace for the last couple tenths of a mile.  I ended up completing the 3.5 miles in 32:47 - more than 2 minutes faster than any of my previous attempts!!!!  :oD

It's times like these I realize that I sometimes hold myself back because I'm afraid of starting out too fast.  I'll probably be sore tomorrow, but it'll be worth it.  Just had to share my small victory!!! 

A Lot to Think About

Sometimes I get bored when I run on the treadmill.  I don't like to watch TV, and I hate listening to music, so there's not much else to do but think.  You wouldn't believe the ground my mind covers in such a short amount of time.  With so much rain this week, the treadmill and I have spent some real quality time together - which means I've had lots of time to think too.  And I had an epiphany yesterday during my 3 and a half mile run on the treadmill.  Ok, maybe epiphany is a bit strong, but I definitely came to a realization.  Warning: this is the part where I get all sappy and reflective - so stop now if you're not all about that.

Anyhow, as I ran and watched the miles and time pass by on the treadmill's display, I started to think about my first few attempts at running when I had first decided this was something I wanted to do.  The decision at that point had been purely about losing weight.  I'd wanted something intense and quick to get the pounds off, and it certainly has served that purpose.  But what I didn't anticipate was that running would actually change my life (I told you it would get sappy and reflective).  I know that sounds SO incredibly cliche, but I can't think of any other way to say it.  It's no longer just about the weight loss for me, but has oddly become part of my life in a way I never thought  it would - kinda like a part of my identity now.  From the time I was a kid and for as far back as I can remember, I've never had great self-confidence.  My parents loved me, spoiled me, and praised me, so it wasn't that.  And I got straight A's all the way through grade school, high school, and even college.  But no matter how much my parents loved me and how many A's I got in school, I always felt like I wasn't as good as everyone else.  I don't really know why or how to explain it, but I've always constantly dis-credited myself and my achievements because I feel like I'm not good enough.  It still affects my life today - it's one of my biggest obstacles at work, and even though I am 100% sure my husband loves me more and more every day, there's always a part of me that can't understand why he'd want to.  Don't get me wrong, it's not debilitating.  It's more of a nagging feeling inside me that always causes me to second-guess everything I am and everything I do. 

All that to say that my great epiphany on the treadmill the other day was that running has actually helped me make significant improvements in my self-confidence.  For the first time in my life, I actually feel good about myself and what I'm doing.  Every time I PR, every time I run a little further, every time I fit into a smaller size pants, or just any time I think back on how far I've come, I am amazed at myself.  I am proud of what I've accomplished and can't wait to share it with anyone who will listen.  I love to brag about my PR's and how far I can run now.  I actually ask my husband to take pictures of  me these days, and I show off to him how my old clothes fall off of me.  I'm starting to like the way I look and want to show it off.  I brag to people about not using butter in my cooking for over 6 months, and I love to have people sample my new healthy cooking when it turns out well.  I have never in my life felt so good about myself, and this is the first time that I've actually felt like something I'd done was worth bragging about.  My husband has noticed that I'm a happier person in general and has commented that he's noticed the difference in me.  I am truly amazed at what my body has shown me it can do and I can't wait to push it farther.  Never in a million years did I think I'd be running 3.5 miles on a regular basis - and planning to run 10k someday in the near future.  For something that started out as a weight loss goal, it sure has been life-changing.  Which I guess is why I haven't stopped even though I've reached my goal weight range at this point. I'm not sure what my ultimate goal is yet for running, but I'm just going to keep pressing on towards my next goal (the 10k).  I don't really anticipate ever wanting to run a marathon, but I guess I'll cross that bridge if I ever come to it.  For now, I'll stick to being satisfied with seeing my progress along the way and building my own path in life.  My journey has been so full of sweat and exhaustion, but I've enjoyed every minute of it.  For all you sappy people out there like me, don't be afraid to be proud of yourself - you deserve it.  Even if you haven't reached your goal yet - or like me, don't quite know your ultimate goal - be proud of your progress along the way.

Rain, Rain, Rain.....and Oh Yeah, More Rain

After the gorgeous and unseasonably warm weather we had last week here in Northeast Ohio, we're certainly paying the price this week.  High temperature dropped about 35 degrees overnight, and all it's done now for over 2 days is rain.  Hurricane Sandy is taking her good old time moving along, and in the meantime, it just keeps raining here.  Now the wind has started to pick up too, and a lot of the area schools are already starting to close for tomorrow.  Overall, it's downright miserable.  Cold, gloomy, dreary, windy, and rainy.  Day after day, night after night.  And according to the weather forecast, none of that is going to change for another 4 days!!!!!!!!  Blah!  (I must applaud myself, by the way, for choosing this week as my week off of work - such skill at picking a nice week to enjoy...)  In case you think I'm exaggerating, schools are closing (as I mentioned above), news outlets are warning people to stock up on generators and food staples, and there's even speculation of post-poning Trick-or-Treat. 

Needless to say, these are less than ideal conditions for running, at least in my opinion.  I'll just come right out and admit it: I'm not one of those people that runs outside in the rain.  I know there are plenty of runners who do, and plenty that also say you're not a true runner if you don't run in the rain, snow, ice, freezing temperatures, etc.  Well, don't call me a runner then.  I don't care what those people think.  I run to relax, to take in the world around me, to release my stress from the day, and to feel that sense of accomplishment when I'm done.  I don't run to torture myself.  And to me, running outside as rain pelts me in the face so I can hardly see and have to squint to try to keep the rain from hitting me square in the eyeball would not be enjoyable.  I don't mind a sprinkle here and there while I run - those might even be kinda relaxing - but a steady rain or better just isn't my thing.  Why put myself through that when I have a treadmill in my basement?  No, I don't enjoy the treadmill as much as running outside, but compared to running outside in sideways rain, it's a total joy.  :o) 

As I mentioned before, I have this gorgeous week off of work.  One would normally think this is a great thing for my running/exercise routine and my healthy eating.  Wrong.  I'm the type of person that operates best on a routine schedule.  Weekends are always my downfall, so a whole week of "weekend-like" days could be dangerous.  Today happened to be no exception.  I decided to bask in the glory of sleeping in and waking up without the aid of an alarm (come on, how often does anyone really get to do that?!?!?!), and then started a DVR marathon from the comfort of my couch.  There's just something about weather like this that makes sweat pants, the couch, a blanket, and the TV seem like a fantastic idea.  Unfortunately, this type of situation also usually leads to snacking for me.  My husband worked all afternoon, and he started laughing at me when he came home and I told him that I can't be trusted to stay home by myself with food in the house.  He made me admit to him that I scarfed down 3 Reese's cups, a can of pop, some cookies, some popcorn, and even a couple bites of ice cream, just to name a few.  Sure there were a few healthy items mixed in there, but it seemed like I just kept eating all day long. 

As the evening started to roll around, I realized that all of this crappy eating was actually making me feel pretty gross.  Now, I'm the type of person who eats junk food, chocolate, cookies, etc. as comfort foods.  They make me happy - they make me feel better.  But these days, when I over-do it like I did today, I feel disgusting and sluggish.  I made up my mind right then to turn the day around, get up off the couch, and run.  Since outside wasn't an option for me, I wasn't going to let that stop me, so I hopped on the treadmill, determined to stick with my plan to run 3.5 miles for these next 2 weeks (as part of my plan for progressing towards 4 miles).  I felt tired (probably from all the junk food), but I felt pretty good too.  I pushed past the tiredness and tried to focus on relaxing to take my mind off of it.  Before I knew it, 2 miles had gone by, and I was still feeling good.  It got a little harder from there, but I was determined not to walk.  When I ran 3.5 miles outside last week for the first time ever, my pace was a little over 10 minutes per mile, so I purposely set the treadmill at 10 minutes per mile tonight.  The plan was to keep that pace the whole time without stopping to walk, and then to pick up the pace right at the end so I could finish with an average pace under 10 minutes per mile this time.  I seriously thought about stopping a couple times - especially when I really wanted a drink of water.  Let me tell you, taking a drink of water while running 6 mph on a treadmill is simply not possible.  I know because I tried.  I didn't want to stop but I also wanted a drink.  Well after spilling it on myself and almost chipping a tooth on the water bottle, I gave up without taking a drink.  Hahaha!  It was one of those times I was glad no one was around....

Anyhow, I ended up making it through my run just like I'd planned, in 34:45 - just under 10 minutes per mile.  I felt so much better after I ran and was no longer sluggish.  I re-arranged some of the furniture in the basement we'd been meaning to do, and even put the basement railing back up by myself.  I guess there really is something to that saying about exercise making you less tired.  Now if I can just stay on track the rest of this week...  :o) 

Taking the Next Step

After my crazy meltdown on Monday, I relaxed and realized there were several more days this week with an awesome weather forecast for me to enjoy outside runs.  And did I ever take advantage of that!  I was out there every day this week, basking in the glory of the nearly 80 degree temperatures in late October.  I knew this was most likely my last chance to run in weather like this until spring. The 10-day forecast showed high temperatures in the upper 40's every day next week - yes, this is the type of weather we deal with in Northeast Ohio.  80 degrees one week, followed by 40 degrees less than a week later....  And everyone wonders why I get upset about the end of summer!

Anyhow....I decided to take full advantage of this miracle weather and ran out the door onto the bike trail the minute I got home from work every night.  One day early in the week I was running along, completely in my element, loving every sight and smell, and enjoying the feel of the warm air on my skin.  I was relaxed and smiling on the inside, thinking more about my surroundings than my actual run.  Then I realized that I was coming up on my halfway point - I was almost to a mile and a half - and that I felt really really good.  I'm usually longing to walk at that point, but I didn't even feel tired yet.  I just kept running, losing myself in the beauty and peacefulness of the world around me, and I continued to feel  just as good.  As I passed the 2 mile mark, I started thinking about my plan to eventually start adding distance to my runs.  What a perfect opportunity to try this out, I thought.  It's a beautiful day, I was feeling fantastic, and there was still enough daylight left to add 5-6 minutes onto my run.  And I really wanted to try it out outside first rather than on the treadmill.  There's just something more satisfying to me about achieving my goals outside.  I didn't want to over-do it though, even though I knew I wouldn't have many more opportunities for outdoor running for quite awhile.  I decided on 3 and a half miles - just 0.4 of a mile more than usual.  I thought that was do-able - although sometimes those last couple tenths of a mile seem to be longer than the entire rest of my run!

So I passed 3 miles, and 3.1 miles and just kept going.  Don't get me wrong, I was starting to get tired, and the thought crossed my mind to just stop at my usual 3.1.  But I was too curious.  I had to know if I could keep going.  Plus, I'd already made up my mind to stick it out for 3.5 miles.  Quitting before that would have been too much like giving up, and I'd be disappointed in myself.  Long story short, I ended up making it.  It was harder than I had anticipated for just a short distance further, but it honestly felt really good.  I really didn't feel too bad!  And I wasn't all that much slower than my normal pace either.  I actually think I was slow because I was too caught up in enjoying the weather and nature - and because I was afraid to pick up the pace if I was going to try running further than usual.  (Sometimes I wonder how much better I could be if I wasn't so darn conservative all the time!)

So as I cooled down I thought about the run and realized that was the farthest I had ever attempted to run.  And that meant it was also the furthest I had ever actually run too!  Awesome!  I was actually feeling kinda "bad-ass" at that point.  Hahaha!  Not only could I run 3.5 miles, I could also keep up a pretty average pace while doing it.  Take a bow.... :o)

After I was done with all the internal gloating, I came home and vowed to start incorporating the longer distance into my routine over the next few weeks when I could.  Unfortunately, I haven't yet had the chance again.  I was going to attempt it again the next night, but I ran out of daylight before I even hit 3 miles (and I'll admit that my legs were really really tired from the extra distance the day before).  The daylight was again an issue with my next run, but I'm hoping to get in another run tomorrow - although inside - and I'll shoot for 3.5 miles there.  Gotta keep working towards that long-term goal of running a 10k next summer!!!! 

Anger Management and Running in the Dark

I'd been looking forward to this evening all weekend.  It was supposed to be a 70 degree day today, full of sunshine.  What a perfect opportunity to run outside!  I got into work early with all the motivation of getting out of there as early as possible to enjoy the sun and temps with a much-anticipated outdoor run.

If I've learned anything so far in life, it's that if I get my hopes up for something, it generally doesn't work out as planned.  Lo and behold, this time was no different.  Surprise, surprise.  I ended up having to stay late at work to help get a project done and meet some client deadlines.  I worked furiously, watching the sunlight slowly fade each time I happened to get up and catch a glimpse out of the windows.  I wanted to cry.  I don't mean this figuratively either - I was practically fighting back tears as I listened to others head home to enjoy their nights.  The longer I sat at the desk, the more frustrated I got.  I alternated between anger, disappointment, frustration, and defeat.  I finally got to a point where I could leave the office and finish the rest from home later tonight.  I've never packed up so quickly in my life.  I watched the clock for the entire car ride home, knowing it was already too late to run outside.  It was already past sunset (according to my weather app), and we were all driving with our lights on.  I honestly don't believe I did this, but I lost it on the way home.  I know it wasn't entirely about missing a perfect day for a run, but I felt silly anyway.  I felt a few tears in my eyes and on my cheeks and did my best to suck it up.  Then I got angry, took out my frustration on my steering wheel, and then started crying again.  (I swear I'm not hormonal!)  After I pulled myself together, I switched to defiance, deciding that work and darkness weren't going to stop me from enjoying a run outside today.

I ran inside when I finally got home, threw some food in the cat's dish as I got changed (the poor thing puts up with so much), and then grabbed a flashlight and headed out the door.  I did another thing I can't believe too - I scooped up my glasses off the counter as I rushed by, deciding last-minute that my safest bet was to try wearing them.  (A little background here - I can't see far away all that well, and it's significantly worse when it's dark.  But my prescription isn't strong enough for contacts, so I just have to wear glasses at night or in dark settings, like movie theaters.)  Anyhow, I felt ridiculous as I headed out the door in the dark with my glasses on and flashlight in tow.  The trail I run on is not lit and crosses several roads, but my plan was to light my way with the flashlight and just keep circling between the two roads bordering my stretch of the trail.  If I got uncomfortable, I vowed to just go home - at least I would have tried.

I was in such a hurry and still so frustrated that I didn't even walk to warm up.  I just took off running.  My mind was everywhere and I could tell I wasn't focusing on form, pace, or breathing.  About a quarter of a mile down the trail, I came up on the paved pathway from my neighborhood onto the trail - and I had an epiphany.  The streets in my neighborhood are lit with street lights.  Duh!!!!!  I quickly turned around and headed down the path into my neighborhood instead.  I couldn't believe how dumb I was not to even think of running on the streets instead!  It's definitely not my preference - the neighborhood is small (just three small cul-de-sac's) so I have to keep looping around, and it's basically all hills (which I hate).  But it was better than running in the dark or not running at all at this point.

I was pretty distracted for most of my run and tired out quickly because of it.  I wasn't relaxed, which also didn't help.  I only ran 2.25 miles, and it actually ended up being a pretty miserable excuse for a run.  I was slow and tired.  My glasses kept sliding off my face because I was sweating.  But guess what?  I felt better by the time I got home.  Even if it wasn't my best run ever and even if I almost broke my glasses a few times, I let off some of that steam from earlier today and got to take in the beauty of the day as I walked to cool down.  I rejoiced in the feel of the still-70 degree temps on my skin and felt the post-run satisfaction and relaxation settle in.  I was feeling more like myself again, even if I didn't run far or fast.

I suppose I should stop procrastinating though, and get back to that work project.  There are a couple more nice days in this week's forecast that I'm looking forward to, so hopefully they turn out better than today! 

Finally!!! Sub-30!!

I'm a firm believer that no matter how busy you are, you can still find a way to fit exercise into your life.  In fact, it's why I started running in the first place - I wanted something quick, but super intense.  And something that didn't require a gym or a lot of equipment.  With the bike path in my backyard, running seemed like the most reasonable answer.  No driving to a gym, no equipment to buy and set up; just walk out my back door and walk back in when I'm done.  Even less excuses not to exercise.

Well things have been a little busy for me this week, but I wouldn't sacrifice running (maybe my blog, but not the running).  There were even a couple nights I didn't start running until 9:30 at night on the treadmill.  Not exactly ideal...but still better than skipping it all together.  In fact, one of those nights produced a personal best for me on the 5k distance (although I'm not yet convinced that it counts when I'm running inside on the treadmill). 

I got outside a couple times too, and was itching to get out again today.  As I sat all day working, I couldn't wait for 5:00 to arrive so I could hurry up and change and get out the door.  It was actually pretty decent weather, and I wasn't going to pass that up.  So I headed out, still thinking about the personal best I'd achieved earlier in the week, of 30:08 for 5k.  I was SO close to being under 30 minutes.  Just 9 seconds.  How frustrating.  But then again, as I said before, I wasn't entirely convinced it counted anyway, because it was on the treadmill.  It's so easy to manipulate the speed of the treadmill as you're running to figure out how fast you need to be going to get a PR.  Sure, I still have to keep up, but I feel like the treadmill is kinda helping me keep that pace.  Not that it's easier (on the contrary - I feel like running on a treadmill is much harder than running outside) - it's just easier to pace yourself and figure out how fast you're going and need to be going.

Anyway, this was all on my mind as I headed out the door, and I just wanted to validate my treadmill runs outside.  It was like I needed to prove to myself that I really could do it, and that meant I had to do it outside on my own.  I felt really good for the first mile, and was going at a good pace.  As I ran, I couldn't help calculating if I was on pace with my treadmill run from earlier in the week (my nerdy accountant personality just won't go away sometimes).  Turns out I was doing pretty good.  And as I kept running, I was keeping up.  It was a little chilly outside, so I was having some trouble breathing through my nose, but I couldn't let that stop me.  As I got closer and closer to the end of my run, I was getting excited.  I just wanted to hear my GPS tracker tell me I'd reached 3.1 miles in some time frame that started with 29 instead of 30 or 31.  I'd never heard that before.

I passed the 3 mile mark and was just a few seconds over 29 minutes.  I knew I had to hurry, and I really took off at that point.  Not that I had much energy left.  But I didn't care.  I made energy.  And before I knew it, that woman's voice was telling me I'd reached 3.1 miles in "29 minutes and 54 seconds."  What?!?!  Really????  I didn't really think I was going to make it!!!  Sure, it was only 6 seconds under 30 minutes, but it was under 30 minutes anyway!  :oD 

I was so tired and so out of breath that I actually stopped completely and bent over to try to catch my breath. (I know - bending over does nothing to help me breathe, but it was the only thing my body could do right then.)  I really just wanted to sit down right there on the ground without caring who saw me - yes, I was that exhausted.  Embarrassing, but I was.  It must have really been my lucky day though, because as I looked to my left, I was standing directly in front of a bench.  I couldn't have been happier.  I just ran a 5k in under 30 minutes for the first time ever, AND I had a bench to rest on.  Now I realize this is the exact opposite of what I should have done - I should have just kept walking - but it was a special occasion and I felt like I deserved a short sit on the bench, especially because it was so conveniently located right in front of me.

I finally got up and walked a bit to cool down (after a motivational meow from the local attack cat - a stray cat in the area that thinks it's amusing to spring out of the weeds as people run by).  And I felt so good.  Not only had I validated my treadmill run, but I had also reached one of my goals by running the 5k distance in under 30 minutes.  :oD    I'm sure I have a ways to go before my runs are consistently under 30 minutes, but that means a new goal for me.  I'm thinking of increasing my distance this time to work my way up to 4 miles.  I have already decided that I want to try a 10k race next summer, so I'll have to start increasing my distance eventually.  Why not now? 

You Can't Out-Exercise a Bad Diet

 "You can't out-exercise a bad diet."  I've heard this saying many times but it's suddenly very determined to prove itself true in my life.  If you happened to read my last post, you know I let my weight get out of my maintenance range.  I hit the trail and the treadmill with a vengeance this week - I ran 5 days in a row, Monday through Friday, completely ignoring my rest day (I know - a big "no no" in running, but I just felt guilty if I didn't run).  I even got a personal best on my 2 mile route (18:53) and came close a couple times on my 5k route.  I certainly wasn't taking it easy.

My diet was a different story.  It was more like a rollercoaster compared to my steamroller of a running routine this week.  I started out the week really well.  I reverted back to my healthy eating habits with pride and motivation, only to slowly face a fight with my own self control as I walked by the chocolate chip cookies several times a day, watched my friends eat taco salads and pasta for lunch, and listened to my hubby whine about the lack of "hearty" food anymore.  I began to slide again.  I'd pig out for a whole day.  Or start out the day really well but eat a bad lunch and then follow it up with too much food for dinner and chocolate chips or cookies later at night. 

I am just having such a hard time in the self control area lately.  I'll exercise till I'm blue in the face.  I'll run my heart out till I can't feel my legs and I'm ready to pass out from lack of oxygen.  But ask me to pass up a box of chocolate chip cookies or a bag of chocolate chips that I know are in the cupboard?  That's actually harder for me than running 3 miles in under 31 minutes. 

And needless to say - the old saying is true - for me at least.  Turns out I really can't out-exercise my bad diet.  Because the scale hasn't budged.  Well it budged for a couple days while I managed to control myself and eat well.  Then it shot right back up out of range as I lost that control.  I'm not anywhere near my highest weight, but I'm still not happy with myself.  I'm hoping that I can suck it up from here on out and get back into my healthy eating habits.  Once I'm back in the habit I'm certain I'll be fine.  I just have to get over craving the chocolate and the sweets so much.  Ha!  Wish me luck! 

Although my love of chocolate has led me to an awesome discovery!  In my endless searching of Pinterest, I came across a recipe to make a "skinny" version of boxed brownie mix.  I thought this might be a great way to help me get through my cravings while not eating so poorly, so I decided to give it a try.  Plus it would give my hubby something seemingly unhealthy to chow down on.  I crossed my fingers and gave it a shot.  The recipe called for using a boxed brownie mix, but replacing the oil with half the amount of 0% fat greek yogurt, and using double the amount of eggs but only using the egg whites, and then using the same amount of water as the box says.  The mix seemed really watery compared to normal, but I stuck it in the oven anyway.  (Side bar - I added some baking chocolate chips to the mix - which raises the calories - but this is what I always do and the husband and I adore it.  I also added frosting, which the recipe doesn't either.  So - not as healthy as the recipe, but still healthier than if I had made them the regular way.)  I tried one a bit later and was pleasantly surprised!  They actually tasted normal - and really good!  I didn't even tell the hubby they were the "skinny" version, and he couldn't tell when he ate one!  This recipe comes highly recommended: "Skinny" boxed brownie mix

Anyhow, wish me luck this coming week that I only eat the "skinny" brownies and can stay away from copious amounts of junk food!  I've done this before; I know I can do it again.  I just have to believe in myself.  :o)

But I Love Chocolate and Cookies....

I know I haven't been writing much, and to be completely honest it's because there hasn't been much to write about recently.  I was slowly letting my eating habits slip, with multiple birthday celebrations, dinners and lunches out, cakes and desserts, and other emotional eating to deal with stress at work.  I knew my weight was at the top of my maintenance range, but I just kept going.  After all, one bad meal or one bad day doesn't ruin everything, right?  Too bad I was having more than one bad meal a day some days and more than one bad day a week.  And when I start to eat poorly, I get lazy and tired.  Which means I make excuses not to workout.  All this to say that I finally woke up one morning, stepped on the scale, and to my horror saw a number above my maintenance range. 

Now, I'm not normally a person who's motivated by stuff like this.  When things start going downhill, they usually keep going - faster and faster - because it gets me down, I get defeated, and I start thinking that it's all too hard and just not worth it anymore.  I've been there before.  So when I got off the scale and looked at myself in the mirror, I could honestly see that I'd gained back some pounds.  I'd been ignoring it but it was time to face the facts.  And I had a decision to make. 

I was arguing with myself - it would be oh so easy and so wonderfully enjoyable to just keep sliding and revert back to my old habits.  It was so tempting.  Cookies, ice cream, lots of sitting on the couch, pizza, fast food, and pasta.  I love it all.  I looked at myself in the mirror again.  I didn't smile.  And I thought about how proud I used to be and how big my smile was when I was at my fittest and was still shedding the pounds (in a healthy way).  I thought about how good I felt - not just about myself and my body, but about what I had pushed myself to accomplish along the way and how much less sluggish I felt on a daily basis.  I loved that feeling so much.  But I love junk food and chocolate so much too. 

I went back and forth and finally decided that I needed to stop being a pansy, suck it up, and get back to work.  I could still have chocolate and cookies and pizza - just not everyday and not in large quantities.  I'd just gone overboard the last couple weeks.  It wasn't the end of the world.  I needed to give myself a good swift kick and a dose of motivation.  I'd done this before and could do it again.  I wanted to be proud of myself again and promised there and then that I'd get back there. 

I'm still out of my maintenance range as of this morning, but I told my wonderful hubby/personal trainer that I needed a little more help and guidance, and I know he'll be wonderful.  I made us a great healthy dinner last night (a great pork lo mein dish that you can find here: Pork Lo Mein - and surprise surprise, I didn't have all the ingredients, so I swapped out the teriyaki glaze for some reduced sodium soy sauce I had on hand - absolutely amazing results.  Highly recommended by both of us!), and I got back on the treadmill today.  It would have been so easy to skip my run again tonight.  I had hurried home from work, ate a small portion of our leftovers for dinner, then rushed outside to try to get the grass cut before dark.  Mind you, I was also trying to cut grass in 43 degree weather.  Needless to say, I ran out of daylight before the grass was done, and my hands were so cold I had contemplated going back inside for gloves.  Not ideal conditions for a run by the time I stopped cutting the grass.  And there was vacuuming to be done, dishes to be washed, bills to be paid, and clean laundry to be put away.  Lucky me - I had that brand new treadmill waiting for me in the basement.  I could have easily skipped my run again with all I had to do around the house, but I prioritized.  I reminded myself how embarrassed I was of letting my weight get out of range and how badly I wanted to feel good again.  Before I knew it, I was downstairs in my basement running.  And boy do I feel good now.  I feel refreshed and motivated - ready to get back on track and start making myself proud again!  After all, I already set a goal for myself to run a 10k next summer, and I'm not exactly going to be able to do that if I stop running now...  ;o)