I'm Back!

Holy cow!  I can't believe how long it's been since I've written.  Things have just been crazy hectic around here lately, between the year-end rush at work before the dam breaks in January, to birthdays and Christmas get-togethers, and friends coming home from out of town, I feel like I barely have time to breathe.  I'm getting up earlier than usual in the mornings so I can get into work a bit early and get more done, I'm staying there later, then we have all these things after work on weekdays and weekends alike, and it's all I can do to squeeze in my running, let alone write about it.  And when it comes down to choosing between running and writing about running, I'm going to make the smart choice and run.

I'm not going to lie.  I'm exhausted.  I've barely finished my Christmas decorating, barely started my Christmas shopping, don't even have a single Christmas card written out, am falling further and further behind at work, and the house is a mess while bills are dangerously close to being late and things like the deadline for deciding between two different health insurance plans are looming over my head, closer each day.  I've run out of clean bath towels and am picking out my clothes from the clean laundry basket because they haven't made it back into the drawers and closets yet.  I've cried and broken down more than once in the last few weeks.  And sometimes what pushes me over the edge is something as dumb as realizing that the pineapple I'm trying to grow in OHIO in the middle of winter is most likely dead after all my hard work on it this summer. 

And I know you're all laughing at me right now.  But I stress out easily.  Which is also dnagerous for me, because I'm a very emotional eater.  But you know what?  Despite my messy house, my lack of cards and gifts for Christmas, and my ever-growing to-do list, I've still managed to run at least a mile every single day.  I haven't broken my Holiday Running Streak since Thanksgiving.  I've changed my priorities and let some other things fall by the wayside a bit.  And I've had to get a little creative sometimes in order to squeeze in a run.  I've gone out to dinner or restaurants without washing my hair after very sweaty runs (don't worry, I at least showered the rest of me), I've started my runs after 10:00pm at night, and I almost ruined a surprise party for a friend because I was late after insisting I needed to run between work and the party.  But again - I ran every day. 

What's even more surprising is that I've made some significant improvements and breakthroughs over the last few weeks.  You'd usually think that I'd just be coasting along running only a mile every day to fulfill my requirement for the Holiday Running Streak.  But that's just not how I'm built.  Instead, I know how much time I have from the minute I step on the treadmill or walk out the door to the minute I need to be back upstairs or back in the house, and if that means I have to run faster than usual to get in the same distance, then I'm going to push myself to run faster.  Believe it or not, being pressed for time is apparently very beneficial for finding out that you've been holding yourself back!  I consistently run my 4 mile route faster and faster every time, improving all the time.  And on the days that I run less than 4 miles, I realize that if I can run 4 miles at that pace, then I can run 2 or 3 miles in a pace that's faster than my 4 mile pace.  I've shaved off over 2:30 from my original 4 mile time (and it's only been a few weeks that I've been attempting to run that distance),  and I'm now running 4 miles at a pace faster than I used to run my 5k route.  So when I realized that, I decided it was time to try really pushing myself on a 5k route (keep in mind, this is all being done on a treadmill inside - it's dark in the morning when I leave for work and dark when I walk out of the office to come home, and my trail and neighborhood are both too dark for my liking - so it all comes with a little asterisk in my mind.  I feel like it doesn't really count until I prove to myself that I can do it outside too.)  Anyhow, I decided to really push myself on a 5k route the other day and ended up running it in 27:22.  WAY better than I'd ever run this distance before.  In fact, after I thought about it for awhile, it was even faster than the time it took me to run just 2 miles when I first started out (approximately 28:30).  What an eye opener!  I always feel like I'm not very good at running, and that I'm not really progressing much.  Probably because (even though I know I shouldn't) I compare myself to others.  But when I realize that a pace around 9:30 is now comfortable for me for 4 miles, and that I can run 3.1 miles in less time than it used to take me to run just 2 miles, I'm infinitely proud of myself.  So what if someone else is running faster than me or trying a half marathon when I am intimidated by the thought of a 10k this summer?  I've come a long way - and I'm going to keep pushing myself.  And I need to learn to be content with that, regardless of what everyone else around me is doing. 

But alas, I've let time get away from me, and now it's going to be another late night.  (I still have to do laundry!)  So I'm facing another day of being exhausted and behind tomorrow - AGAIN.  But at least I'll know I have a run to look forward to when I get home from work!